April Moments

Maybe, just maybe, telling the story is just as important as the story itself

The big deal about bangs

One of my all-time favorite movies is “Legally Blonde.” I watch it every time it’s on TV. I can’t help myself.

There are so many great lines. Some of my favorites:

  • “Whoever said orange was the new pink was seriously disturbed.”
  • “She could use some mascara and some serious highlights, but she’s not completely unfortunate looking.”
  • “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don’t shoot their husbands. They just don’t!”

One scene I particularly love shows Harvard law student Elle Woods talking on the phone with her two best friends, Margot and Serena. Elle is noticeably sad, feeling lonely and isolated from her sorority sisters in Los Angeles.

Elle realizes how far apart her world is from her friends’ lives, especially when Margot reveals that she has recently gotten engaged and is choosing her wedding dress. Serena then grabs Margot’s phone to ask Elle if she has successfully won back her ex-boyfriend, Warner.

“Um, almost,” Elle answers. Serena tells her to hurry because they miss her! Elle takes that as her cue to get sentimental. “Oh, I miss you guys too. The people here are so vile. Hardly anybody speaks to me unless…”

“Oh my gosh! I almost forgot to tell you,” Serena interrupts. “I got bangs! My hair is so now.”

What could be more important than bangs, right? Call me crazy, but I’m only kind of kidding. Getting bangs is a big deal. I have not had them since junior high, back when “big hair” was trendy. You know, the two-part bangs, with the top half curled up and the bottom half curled down? Wasn’t my best look.

I am not judging anyone for having bangs. I know several women who totally rock bangs, and they are beautiful. But for me, bangs do not work. I also fully acknowledge that bangs are a commitment. They need to be trimmed frequently, and if you do have bangs and you choose to grow them out, well, God be with you, my friend.

I’ve always had messy hair, and I sort of like it that way. I do not have time to really fix my hair in the mornings, and, since it’s wavy and wild, I know it would not stay situated anyway.

When I was in high school, my parents would always ask me to pull back my hair. Beg, actually. I can still hear my mom: “Your hair looks so much better when it’s out of your face.” She doesn’t say that to me anymore. I’m not sure what changed. I think my hair is still as messy as it used to be, although it’s not as long as it was in the 90s. Perhaps she just realized that the nagging didn’t work.

Apparently, my nagging doesn’t work either. I’ve written about Cecilia’s resistance to hair accessories in the past, but now that her hair is getting longer, it hangs in her face and is starting to cover her eyes. I sound like my mother when I tell my 1-year-old, “Please leave that ponytail alone. You look so much better when your hair is out of your face.”

C.C. doesn’t listen though. She pulls out whatever bow, clip or ponytail holder I’ve placed in her fine, straight locks.

This is all coming to a head, though. Neither my husband nor I wants Cecilia to go through life with her hair hanging in her beautiful face. So, a few days ago, Mike said it. He suggested the unthinkable: “I think she should have bangs.”

I gave him the look – raised eyebrows, wide eyes, open mouth, chin down. My icy stare was so piercing, it nearly cut out his soul. I let the words just hang there, so he could hear how ridiculous they sounded.

Finally, he couldn’t stand my eyes stabbing him anymore. “What?” he asked.

“Absolutely not. We cannot do that to her.”

“Why not? She won’t leave her hair back, and it’s always hanging in her face.”

“No bangs. That is a huge commitment, and I will not do that to her. If she wants to have bangs later in life, that can be her decision.”

“OK, well, maybe we can find ponytail holders that she will actually leave alone.”

“I’ll work on that.”

Thanks to the ladies at Cecilia’s daycare center, I did not have to do any work. When I picked her up Monday, I was shocked to see her hair in two cute pigtails. She seemed to be fine with that hairstyle too. I was hesitant to say anything to the daycare workers, figuring that C.C. would start pulling out the ponytails at any mention of her hair.

“How did you get her to leave those alone?” I asked one of the girls.

“They are like rubber bands – more difficult for her to take them out,” she replied.

“Alright. Awesome. I’ll have to buy some of those.”

Cecilia still likes to pull on her ponytails, but these particular hair bands are stickier than the ones we were using. They mostly stay put.

Problem solved? Only time will tell. I still vow not to burden her with bangs.

Read “The big deal about bangs, part 2.”

Originally published on ovparent.com.

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